Algebra

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“Two Quarters? What's that? I'm Fifty Cent, nigga.”
~ Curtis Jackson on on making change

Algebra is the addition of letters and numbers to make more numbers, and most math is done this way, the answers are decided by a council of elders in years past in the land of Mordor. All future problems are solved on precedent. He who must not be named is the only wizard to have broken the Algebra-English barrier.

It is due to this magical man that those who are referred to as "Wiz Kids" are actually involved in the dark arts of magical mathematics.

In the year 1208, the same as Beowulf, Algebra was created to contain Grendel the Math Dragon. With his Math Blaster loaded on his Commodore 64, he defeated the Imperial Wizard of Math by a ratio which we now know as delicious pi.

William Shakespeare the great writer actually coined many of the equations used in modern Algebra.

Luke Skywalker had to learn Algebra to use the force.

Drug Dealers are the only masters of Algebra left, and can create new proofs to fit their budget.

E=MC^2, a formula for making pot brownies while Albert Einstein was working on the Atom bomb is now used to make the freeze-dried food for space travel. That is why they are called Space Cakes.